Yesterday we had a well-child appointment with our beloved pediatrician. He’s a family friend and a very skilled and knowledgeable clinician. He spends time with us talking about the Pie’s development, advising on upcoming issues, and asking about our family. We love him.
But this post isn’t about our Pediatrician, it’s about family planning. He asked if the Mountain Man and I were planning to have another, and I said I wasn’t sure. He said that at our next two appointments the pressure will be on, because he thinks that 2 years is the perfect age gap for siblings. It was a sneak attack of reproductive encouragement that I wasn’t anticipating at all!
I was totally caught off guard – and I think I got a deer in the headlights look.
Obviously he loves kids and families. He has a slew of his own, and his wife and son work with him in the office. He had kids 2 years apart and it worked out really well for him.
I know that two years apart can be nice for kids growing up. My brother and I are about 2.5 years apart which was sometimes fun and sometimes challenging, and my sisters are two years apart and I think they saw fun and challenge as well. But right now I can’t imagine having another until the Pie is a little more independent – when I can explain to her that I need to help the baby and she needs to wait. When she can “help” and feel like the big sister. I’m thinking that will be when she’s around 5.
But by the time she’s that old, it will be like starting over. Diapers will be re-introduced instead of continued. Sleep will have perhaps had time to return, only to be stripped away again. How can I handle a toddler and an infant – how do mamas do it? How do you snuggle the older when the younger needs you so much? How does the older child learn and understand that your attention isn’t gone, just shared?
Have you done it both ways – had kids 2 years apart and more like 4 or 5 or 6? How was it?