Oh company girls, this one's a doozie. I've been starting over my whole life - as a military brat, a job-hopper, and most recently as a wife & mother.
I've often wished for a do-over, but a start-over is so much better. It acknowledges that the experiences were there, valid, and now a part of me. I will turn the page and start over.
I posted yesterday about my inability to understand what "worth it" means when parents talk about their kids. I think I'll understand better when she's a little older, interacting more, communicating more.
I start over every day in my role as a mom. I start over with patience, understanding, and with accepting myself and my new identity.
I am going to start over and not feel like I am trapped by breastfeeding - I can pump and other people can feed if I need to be away/get away. I am going to start over and not mourn the relationship I lost with my husband but celebrate the family we have built and the new relationship we're forming. I am going to keep starting over, every day, to know a little better who I am now as a mother, and who I am as I try to keep a sense of myself alive.